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Posts tagged ‘pink’

Hoarding, Attitude, Motivation

Today, children, we are going to talk about attitude and motivation.

Once upon a time, on a blog far, far away, I was attacked by someone who assumed, based on a few lines on a comment, that I knew nothing about hoarding. At first I was pretty ticked off, but then I had a realization….

I was just slammed for NOT BEING A HOARDER!!!! Now, I also realize this person knows nothing about me and has never seen my home, but I’ve learned to milk every positive thing I can about a situation. My brain happily tries to keep the status quo by reminding of everything bad that I did or that ever happened to me, so I need to consciously acknowledge the good things that do come my way.

Currently I’ve managed to distract my OCD into cleaning. I’m obsessed by ending not only the clutter, but the thoughts that cause the clutter. I had already mentioned that I was a hoarder and was trying to NOT bring it up in every single post about it, since the article was about Minimalism. I guess I succeeded!

I’m hoping that someday I won’t have to constantly be on guard against hoarding behaviour, both mental and physical. I’m working towards finding out what “normal” is for me. I have no desire to be a minimalist, but I do feel it’s valuable to me to see how the other half lives and thinks. I DON’T think it’s helpful to attack anyone else for their living choices. I enjoy other people’s spaces as pertinent to that person’s lifestyle. Noticing I was more comfortable at my friend’s neat home than I was in my own house helped inspire me to do something about my own. I would actually hang out there when I needed motivation.

Hoarding is not all about “stuff”, it’s all about attitude. I had never lived any other lifestyle except hoarding, so I had no idea about how to end it. You can’t end your hoarding habit unless you realize there is a problem and change your attitude towards it. That takes time, and work. Then you can find motivation almost anywhere.

It was a great article by the way. You can read it at Apartment Therapy

The Quote That Finally Changed My Mind on Minimalism

I’ll put the link here as soon as I get permission.

I’m adding this one from the article to my own mantra:

“Desiring less is even more valuable than owning less.” Joshua Becker

Evidently the man wrote a book about Minimalism. I’m not about to read it, so I’m happy that the author of the post brought that quote to my attention.

See? Inspiration from anywhere! I feel that it expresses exactly what ails me as a hoarder. What needed to be changed was my attitude was that every thing had value. I have trouble distinguishing  what valuable is. I save things as memories or emotions. One of the problems with that is, things triggered memories I could live without. For example, I saved a formal dress that my mom had spent extra for. I loved that dress, so I kept it for my own daughter someday. However, by the time my daughter was 12, it was obvious she was never going to fit into that dress. Even though I realized this, I didn’t give it away. After all, mom had spent quite a bit on it. That had made me feel loved and treasured. But that also reminded me that I rarely felt that from mom, and that was not a good memory. Now I only have a photo of me all dressed up in my ruffled Gone With The Wind dress. I can actually see how I looked in all those flounces without having a big box full of pink tulle and netting. Also, my daughter values the photo, while she would have NEVER worn the dress.

On other other hand, I have a faded silk dress with beading from the flapper era that my grandmother wore. I love the 1920s styles. My daughter likes it too, so it’s a keeper. To us, that dress has more value than all my ruffles. It’s decisions like that which are really really hard to make when you are a hoarder. Our lifestyles are very different from the past, we no longer tend to stay in the same house our whole lives, or even in the same area. My mom had room to store stuff, my daughter and I live in small apartments. Mom only held a job for 6 months of her whole life. Her home and family were her work. My job required moving around a lot.

I felt a little guilty giving my pink dress away. I’m sure however that some young girl somewhere enjoyed my pink princess dress. After all, a dress has no feelings, nor does it pay rent for it’s storage.

Update: The person who made the comment did not intend it to sound that way, and apologized. It turns out we have a lot in common, so it’s just another case of text without nuance. But she did say that from what I wrote she had no idea I was a hoarder, so I still get to feel really good about that!

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“Meh” To Majyk

So I’ve been using my nice newly organized office cubby for a bit and I’m really pleased. At the moment, it’s my favorite bit of my apartment. Not coincidentally it’s the prettiest, most organized space in my apartment, but we hoarders must be pleased with our baby steps.

pink1

The Dollar Tree got in the rest of the line of lacy organizers, so I bought a large tray and a little tray. My stickers went from a plastic envelope into the large tray, making them much easier to access. My glue and adhesives went into the smaller tray. All these are easy to pick up and move to wherever I’m working. Before I was just fighting to keep everything organized. I’m noticing at the end of the day I enjoy putting everything back and seeing how nice it looks. It’s really helping me focus on my goals, both the journaling and making little spaces I find satisfying.

“Focus” is my word for 2017. My little ADHD  brain either goes into hyperfocus or into hyper aware. There are so many things I want to accomplish this year!  I’ve printed out the word in a few different typefaces (I love typography!) to stick here and there around the apartment. My brain gets so busy I often find myself in a room, wondering what it was that I went in to get.

One thing I still wanted for my Bullet Journaling was a pen I loved to write with. I had a few gel pens, but I spent as much time getting them unstuck enough to write with as I did journaling. So on my Dollar Tree shopping trip I gave the pen section as much attention as most women probably give a Tiffany’s show window. I love pens! But I wanted one bolder than the fine points I usually get. My eyesight isn’t what it used to be and often by the end of the day when I am journaling I can’t read what I have just written. I want to try a Pilot FriXion Erasable Gel Pen but that will have to wait until I get to the city. What I did find was a Promarx Megabold Gel pen. At two for a dollar, I figured it was worth a try.

pen-doodle

I had to test drive it doing a doodle, and of course there were no shortage of feline models available. I figured a black cat for a black pen was a natural. Majyk was happy to oblige. The photo is a little washed out compared to the real thing, but the pen worked beautifully. The other pens I tried bled to the underside of the paper, this pen didn’t. I’m still getting used to gel pens, and was busy doodling so it smudged a bit. It does dry pretty fast, once I noticed I had smudged it didn’t happen again. It flows nicely for writing and forces me to write larger, which is good. I touched up his eyes with colored pencils. Just a quick sketch, but I think some of his “I didn’t do it!” stare came across. Majyk is the Bart Simpson of the cat world! Five stars for the pen.

Pretty in Pink Office Cubby

Recently I read that one typical problem of hoarders is that we simply don’t figure out where things belong. For instance, my broom floats around my home, usually getting left the last place I used it. I started to put up hooks in the closet for it, but as usual, got distracted, so it remains a floater. Which means I have to look for it every time I use it. It isn’t difficult to find, its yellow with black leopard spots! Still, it adds to the mess and doesn’t bring me joy.

When I moved in here, my needs were very different. I bought a shelving unit that could hold my big monitor and with a cubby and flip down shelf for my pc. All of those were bulky, my printer, my scanner, my pc, large monitor and the unit itself. Since then I’ve gone to a lap top, bought a different printer which lives in my studio and is wireless, bought a flat screen tv which is much too wide for any shelf on the original unit…well you get the picture. I stopped using the cabinet for my office and things just got jumbled out of the way in there.

office-cubby

Recently I’ve been doing workbooks, journaling, and paying my bills downstairs. The office part of my studio really isn’t working, so I decided to reclaim this nice, hidden away spot. I gave some thought into why I didn’t like using it, and came to the conclusion that it was dark and depressing. Even my Puss-In-Boots pencil holder had migrated to the shelf above. Meh.

I’ve declared a moratorium on starting new projects that don’t get me closer to my goal, but I decided that brightening up the space would make me much more likely to use it. I’m probably going to sell the console when I move, the thing weighs a ton and takes up a lot of space. I’m not in love with it, so I didn’t want to paint it and drop the value. Instead, I went through my wall paper books and found a sample I liked. Surprisingly it was pink. It’s only been the last few years that I have been drawn to that color, my mother overdosed me on pink, pink, pink. Our huge kitchen was Pepto Dismal Pink my mom’s whole life. The fridge was pink. The stove was pink. The dishwasher was pink. If she couldn’t get an appliance in pink, she grabbed automobile paint, and yup, sprayed it pink.

It’s not that it looked bad, it was fine. I simply got sick of it. I have red hair, and most pinks did not look good on me. Pink was simply not a part of my life. But the last few years and two little girls, pink has been sneaking back into my life. So, the cubby would be PINK! Not only that, it would be girlie girl. After all, the door closes on it so it shuts away completely. I kind of liked the idea of a lacy hidden office spot.

I decided the easiest way to make over the spot was to simply wrap cardboard in a pretty paper, stick on the wallpaper sample and go from there. When my dad showed me how to make things as a child he would always tell me “measure three times, cut once”. Now, sharp, pointy objects are not compatible with me, inspite of using them on a daily basis in work. In fact, an exacto knife once attacked me by rolling off the light table and sticking in my ankle. I also hate cutting up cardboard but I had a huge box which I had saved to make a fun house for the cats (sorry kits) so I measured at least three times, trimmed, measured, trimmed until my pieces fit nicely. Then all I had to do was wrap the boards. I decided to use cardboard inserts so I could change them out easily.

I had some pink gift wrap paper I hadn’t used for the girls yet, so I just gift wrapped the cardboard. Since this is just a glorified storage space, I didn’t worry about wear and tear, but if I was doing it as a work space, I would use either spray adhesive and a sealer or Modpodge. It would look much nicer and wear a whole lot better. (Note to self, when using fairly thin wrapping paper, make sure the packing label still stuck on the box isn’t going to show through. Sigh)

pretty-office

MUCH nicer! Now to fill it up. Almost hate to hide the pretty!

Organizing my supplies took a lot longer than putting together the boards. I have way too many felt pens and doodads in here still, but as my journal progresses I’ll find what works and what doesn’t. But I now have an organized home for my bill paying, workbooks and Bullet Journal supplies. The only thing I bought for this project was the pink magazine holder and a few plastic pouches to hold the bills, stickers and for taxes. I already have ideas on how to make it even more efficient, now I can see what I have. It also gives me an excuse to buy a another pink magazine holder if they get them in, yay! I also found supplies that belong in my studio and things I forgot I even had.

office-cubby-after

This feels like a win in the battle against hoarding!